Friday, April 25, 2014

Day LXXXII: Sorted

Or perhaps in Slytherin, 
you'll make your real friends,
those cunning folk use any means, 
to achieve their ends.
-The Sorting Hat

I like to think of myself as the world's friendliest Slytherin.

(I don't care if that's hyperbolic, it's the truth.)

My favorite color is green. Next would be silver. I'm a cunning person, and tend to be calculating. I'm ambitious, but would prefer someone else do the work once I've decided what needs to be done. Half the time I play video games, I do it for Playstation Network Trophies or XBOX 360 achievements. I like accomplishments and snide remarks. Sarcasm and sharp humor dictate most of what comes out of my mouth. I'm a resourceful, intelligent human being with a good sense of determination and resolve.

And for those reasons, I identify with House Slytherin.

Slytherin tends to get a bad rap. It's a primary source of dark wizards and witches, and housed many of the wizarding world's most notorious villains. But then there are those like me: kind, genuine, funny, and friendly people who just happen to belong to one of the more frowned-upon groups in the history of fantasy fiction.

Hey, someone's gotta bear the burden.

At first, I think I probably wanted to be a Slytherin because it was the cool and edgy place to be. There's something sinisterly sexy about being a the mysterious and brooding student. The more I have grown and come into my own, however, I've realized that, perhaps, I am Slytherin because no other home is as fitting.

I'm a fairly brave person, and tend to act stubborn or headstrong like a member of Gryffindor might. I'm fiercely loyal to my friends and loved ones, a trait commonly associated with Hufflepuffs. I'm well-read and thoughtful, wiling to be a smarty pants when necessary. But a Ravenclaw? Not quite. Each of the other houses is like a shoe that's a half-size too big or too small. It feels comfortable in the right setting, but you're always aware it's not quite right.

I was thinking a lot about my Slytherin-hood today at work. My boss's husband made the comment today that I'm the most "kiddie-glove" person he's ever met. Apparently, the phrase means "afraid to offend or bother." (It was definitely one I needed to look up....) I've never thought of myself as afraid to bother another person, I just don't care to do it. There's no reason to make others uncomfortable or bothered unless they really deserve it, right? That doesn't make me a "kiddie-glove" weakling.

And like any other sane human being would, I started to question what this assertion from Mike meant for my Slytherin-ness. Because, you know, doesn't everything just come back to Harry Potter? What if he had a point? What if I'm spineless? What if Minnesota-Nice boys can't be Slytherins after all? Where do I go now? Who am I? What does this mean for my future? Am I too timid? Do I need to be meaner? More ruthless? More maniacal than I already am?!

And then a little voice whispered in my ear.

What other people think of you is none of your business.

And, amen, that's exactly what I needed to here.

How fitting that one of my favorite human beings--and (probably) fellow Slytherin--RuPaul should know exactly what to say in present situation. It didn't matter that Mike thought I was "kiddie-glove" or meek. What matters is that I'm not afraid to be friendly, even when it's not deserved.

It might not be the acerbic attitude of your standard Slytherin...

...but I think that's what makes me magical.

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